Shape of My Heart, Sting
I LOVE THIS SONG.

i like songs like that. some kind of a relaxed, laid back tone, and a beautiful concept to the song. (lyrics)
just like jazz and their unique melodies. every singer sings the same song differently, yea.


its been a month since the school holidays blew in. there's lots more time to think about stuff so i guess thats why everyone's getting emo. you read it in blogs everywhere.


I BET because singapore's so puny too, there's no big nature place to keep us alive and kicking and climbing mountains. (i.e. IN NEW ZEALAND.)

-so, we rot at home infront of our computers, or find retail therapy in new big places like vivo. or think about building 8th wonders in our backyards.


YES i found my wild dream-! I WANT TO BE A ROCKCLIMBER, or A MOUNTAINEER.
i should marry one next time yea. (instead of some couch potato.) then migrate to somewhere with real mountains and go mountain climbing every week. or rock climbing.

but. like all wild dreams, its not...practical.
but i guess, its something i'll do if i find out im dying in a year or two.. it feels worth it then.
for some reason, it doesn't feel all that worth it now. it feels like it can wait. haha


its sad huh, how we pursue for things in the man-made world first and foremost, but judging by what people do when they know they are dying soon- it doesnt match with what people are striving so hard towards everyday; money, luxury, bigger houses, branded goods, whatever nots.

its a big fat lie. we were led to think all these material things will make us happy, but they never really do.



hmmmm. i should really start taking into consideration global warming, and how it would affect mountains in the next 50 years like what all the experts are lamenting about.

You Are My Sunshine

You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
You make me happy
When skies are grey
You'll never know, dear
How much I love you
Please don't take my sunshine away

The other nite, dear
As I lay sleeping
I dreamed I held you
in my arms
When I awoke, dear
I was mistaken
And I hung my head and cried

You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
You make me happy
When skies are grey
You'll never know, dear
How much I love you
Please don't take my sunshine away

I'll always love you
And make you happy
If you will only
say the same
But if you leave me
To love another
You'll regret it all some day

You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
You make me happy
When skies are grey
You'll never know, dear
How much I love you
Please don't take my sunshine away

You told me once, dear
You really loved me
And no one else could come between
But now you've left me
And love another
You have shattered all my dreams

You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
You make me happy
When skies are grey
You'll never know, dear
How much I love you
please don't take my sunshine away...



haha, told you it wasn't such a happy song.

eww.
i don't seem to know anything anymore, can't make sense of a lot of stuff. -_-

ohwell. that's good, right! so i won't start thinking life is so perfect i don't have to rely on God.


FISHBONE TOMORROW. pray that God will use us to do His mighty deed during the time tomorrow night. :)

ahh, lunch finally calls. im not relenting X)

-i should start coming online for more constructive reasons-

From a book Nicole kindly lent me long time ago:

It is true. God is good. But that does not mean that bad things will not happen. Floods come, the earth quakes, people die, marriages break up. We cry, but so does God. Remember the powerful words of Isaiah 53:4, as he foretold the coming of the Messiah: "Surely he has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows."

When we hurt, God cares. When we are in pain, God is present to comfort. When we are alone, God can be a strengthening companion.


Lord, make me an instrument of Thy peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is doubt, faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
Where there is sadness, joy;

O Divine Master, grant that I may
not so much seek to be consoled, as console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love.

For it is in giving, that we receive;
It is in pardoning, that we are pardoned;
It is in dying, that we are born to eternal life.
Amen.

St. Francis of Assisi



yea..previous 2 entries were deleted.


hmm
watching the rain has a deep calming effect..

Stumbled on this song by accident, and fell in love with it

=

Shape of My Heart



He deals the cards as a meditation
And those he plays never suspect
He doesn't play for the money he wins
He doesn't play for the respect
He deals the cards to find the answer
The sacred geometry of chance
The hidden law of probable outcome
The numbers lead a dance

I know that the spades are the swords of a soldier
I know that the clubs are weapons of war
I know that diamonds mean money for this art
But that's not the shape of my heart

He may play the jack of diamonds
He may lay the queen of spades
He may conceal a king in his hand
While the memory of it fades

I know that the spades are the swords of a soldier
I know that the clubs are weapons of war
I know that diamonds mean money for this art
But that's not the shape of my heart
That's not the shape, the shape of my heart

And if I told you that I loved you
You'd maybe think there's something wrong
I'm not a man of too many faces
The mask I wear is one
Those who speak know nothing
And find out to their cost
Like those who curse their luck in too many places
And those who smile are lost

I know that the spades are the swords of a soldier
I know that the clubs are weapons of war
I know that diamonds mean money for this art
But that's not the shape of my heart
That's not the shape of my heart

=

nice huh :)
came back from nz yesterday! it was all such a special and unique experience..maybe i'll upload photos next time, but for now i don't wish to spill that special bucket of gold and silver dust.

but i'll tell you if you ask! :)


right now, im just suffering a little from jet lag. very tired, and there's ninjado tonight.TWO MORE WEEKS TO GRADING. dies-
gee la. i'll just pass and be happy this time round.

hahahaha yesterday once the plane touched ground mindy smsed! (she's psychic man) i replied jolyn and mindy's smses, AND THEY IMMEDIATELY CALLED. haha and i talked to jo and mindy both on the phone!
(-while the plane was moving, and my friend beside me was just like staring at me with shocked wide eyes and shouting a "WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ON THE PHONE?!!??")

heh. but ohoh YAY. my loves (:
haha.

wished there was more then technology contact though.
ending with a poem!


17/11.6.26pm
untitled

A city,
built up with icy bricks
polished off
with synthetic glass
and windows glazed

in winter time
winds blow a little,
echoing deep inside
(and sometimes, summers too)

a distant skyline
pasted on a setting ball of flame,
but extinguished
all too fast

promising a city full,
love and so much more
but glance once more
and catch
shadows only of befores

made of
see through glass,
or plastic,
to look around the other side
though sometimes they’re opaque

a map laid, unmagnified
few centimeters hiding millions,
in reality

finger-tip walk across
scant through
with your eyes

and while you're there
on a 24/7,
wish for more than
pixelled
lights.

6/11. 5.25 pm
The Child at the Fence

Still on the backfence
Sits you,
Waving back, and
forth.

Occasionally you'll
Give a smile,
Offer in your little hand
A caramel

"A sweet for yesterday",
you'll beam,
swinging forth,
"All in old times' name"

Pretty on the fence,
Sits you
Of spring time roses
The summer breeze,
A caramel

Reaching out,
I'll brush against
Your plumpy hand

And almost
Like a pendulum,
Watch you travel
back

Lips freezed into a smile,
Your distancing eyes
hold,
fear? who knows

I'll smile a little smile
and
just like yesterday
walk on-
My little walk
On winter's day

And perhaps
I'll see you again,
tomorrow

Still
swinging on the fence.


=


anonymity kills.
because it really just creates a damn whole lot of misunderstanding and assumptions.
-message to intended person not gotten through,
-message to unintended person(s) sweeps through instead

and BINGO! your short cut receipe to Disaster status.

so really, anonymity is just a catastrophic system. so last century/ in the century of disaster-leading systems.


but seriously, whats stopping everyone from using that still every now and then?
(its just terribly inconsiderate, from a moral standing point of view)

=

jiayi regrets not taking literature.
so i should really start reflecting and knocking myself on the head to give thanks for what i've been blessed with.

THE OPPORTUNITY TO STUDY LITERATURE. which is actually wonderful, if you just take time to think about it.

so, for starters, who wants to sponsor me a mirror?

=

evelyn (or affectionately known as Eve -pronounciation:e-vi-) has been officially declared as my little hammer.

she just totally cracks me up XD

=

flyingflyingflying tomorrow!
98.4999999999% done with packing, which actually made me a little bit lazy about going there at first.

BUT ITS DONE, and i should really be trying to get a bit more enthu about it. maybe im just tired and HOMESICK. (HAHA)

kays not funny -_-


=

seriously?
i just don't know why im starting to blog like this. i feel like ive just filled out a notice board.

freaky^2

&

i miss ya!
(this is for mindy and jolyn should you two nut-es see this when you come back from China thawed.)

and it's worth a freaky^3 XD

-

oh hahahaha.
notices and anonymity talks

[edit]
cancellation due to removal out of consideration for the mass public
:)
[edit/]

MINGYI'S POST BEFORE SHE FLEW TO SHANGHAI-

...Packing my luggage was very fun cos my luggage is pink, my small bag is pink and my medium bag is pink! All my clothes are either pink or red, except for blue jeans. Pink sweaters, pink jackets, pink scarf, pink gloves, pink toiletries bag, pink earmuffs, pink hair dryer, pink towels!


-FAINTS-
i think i almost died laughing reading the whole list XD
talk about horror of horrors. hahahaha. (i don't like HOT pink)

BUT I AM NOT SURPRISED. her pencil box/bag/pens/waterbottle/whatever else that can be pink (in school) IS PINK. cute la, that auntie XD
and i think i never fail to comment on her pink fetish when i walk past her table :D

maybe i shall go to school for a week with everything in BLUES, VIOLETS, PURPLES too/ ponders*

-

goodness im flying off on tuesday and i haven't started packing. mindy's mom made her pack 3 WEEKS before her China trip... but ohwell jolyn packed like the DAY BEFORE. (talk about vast differences.)

gee. talking about them, i miss them a lot. :(
CHINA STOLE THEM AWAY.

its hard missing someone! (and in this case TWO at once -_-) but at least i know this has an ending.
if there's no ending... i mean its better to stop missing, and start treasuring, relishing and giving thanks for moments you do have with that person, however little.

thus, missing someone is a "luxury" -subjected to your own control, in this case okay. before everyone starts giving their take on such a controversial statement.

but "luxury" because sometimes i think the ideal of staying in melochany is somewhat tied to nobility.
is it?
-a nice topic to reflect on next time. for now, its just a tad bit too depressing.

-

ive been tagging on the blogs of random people i do not know/ and OHMAN i stumbled upon this blog that had a guy penning all his regrets and pain over a heartbreak in a "final" entry as an ending to the matter.

and as a measure, the entry was long..
it was so painful to read man ><
and the saddest part was that it wasnt concentrated on SELF as many heartbroken entries are.

and its quite sad thinking that people are going through heart breaks all over the world. if only love was simple, huh?



okay.!! CHANGE SUBJECT. dwell not on sad situations. i do dwell on a lot of them huh.
(and move to the next one) :D

my hair's falling off.
literally. hair dresser says its a problem with my scalp being too oily or something. and if i don't get it fixed....(haha)

that red spot sipei pointed out to me a few months back? the lady says its scalp infection.

-declines to splatter emotions here-

but anyway, an incident keeps flashing up. a few months back when i was worried about my then stupid new hair and everything, ended up asking God how my hair was (XD) and the reply still wins hands down as the most comforting line on hair-related issues, ever.


i was walking on the pavement, really worried and scared, even. so i asked, out loud
"God, how's my hair...?"

and the reply,
"i love you, hair or no hair."

haha, and its just a simple, beautiful line and i still remember how it hit me hard inside.


SO. who cares if all my hair falls out? XD
(i'll still be thankful my head's intact)

And sometimes you'll wonder, where are the people when you need them?


need, is a horrible word; when you can't get what you think you need.

*

watched The Prestige today, and it was a beautiful movie. the plot is fabulous, non comparable. twists, turns, you name it. plays with the majority's fasination with magic, illusion... in addition to a dash of its darker side.
haha okay, i shan't spoil the fun. its a beautiful movie. watch it.

the suspense is amazing, really. one of the good movies i haven't got the luck to chance upon in a long long time.

timeline's a little complicated, though. but its a good thing, keeps you on your feet catching up with it. stay close with the story, however and its just magical.



hmm. wondering when was the last time i bothered to review a movie after watching it.


*

spiralling downwards, to someplace i don't want to go back to.

when will i learn not to forsake Him, only to run back when things start going out of control ??
love like no other, mercy unboundless..

yes i am screwed right now.
i hate Mr. I- that hunts me incessantly. i hate Mr. G- that tries to drown me, i hate those men in black that come after me. men i cannot rid of.. they're.. killing me, if you can put it that way, and i can't do anything.


i need God..
the only need farfar from horrible.

i am risking the CONSEQUENCES *thunder booms and lightning flashes* should i be found online at this hour. -gasp-
BUT there's something important ive to say!


HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOVE!
my biggo walking, talking m&m (the 1st m stands for mini) is finally FIFTEEN YEARS OLD !!

ok ew thats pretty disgusting if its really chocolate huh.........
BUT ANYWAY STAY SMALL AND SWEET AND SMILEY! and hope you havent perished in China with jolyn :D

LOVE YA LOTS DEAR<3, don't miss me!


-muacks :)


for the special ones in my life



"There You'll Be"

When I think back
On these times
And the dreams
We left behind
I'll be glad 'cause
I was blessed to get
To have you in my life
When I look back
On these days
I'll look and see your face
You were right there for me

[Chorus:]
In my dreams
I'll always see you soar
Above the sky
In my heart
There will always be a place
For you for all my life
I'll keep a part
Of you with me
And everywhere I am
There you'll be
And everywhere I am
There you'll be

Well you showed me
How it feels
To feel the sky
Within my reach
And I always
Will remember all
The strength you
Gave to me
Your love made me
Make it through
Oh, I owe so much to you
You were right there for me

[Repeat chorus]

'Cause I always saw in you
My light, my strength
And I want to thank you
Now for all the ways
You were right there for me
You were right there for me
For always

[Chorus]


i miss you, you nutty people! X)
yea, i really really do ..


ok, so seriously, you want a birthday kiss the next time we meet? XDD