jin tian de da ji tai duo le


history.
horrible- failed it through and through. even after moderation given to help cushion our whole cohort's fall. still failed.


im such a failure.nothing right.nothing right at all.

with my head on my arms,staring at the white walls of the auditorium, one ear blocked,sounds muffled...so much like a dream.


how i wish it was only a dream.something i would be able to wake up to, and pretended never happened.something that didnt exist.


but,done's done.
i won't be able to wake up, because i was never asleep in the first place. :)



going to keep myself in the heart of the flurry of activities.cannot allow time for myself to stare vacantly into space and rot.cannot allow time to think..rubbish? close.


tomorrow.straight out after school with jolyn!, and rush back for ninjado at night.yes.n fall dead tired to sleep tml night:) dead tired:)


going to go out often,go places i want to go, get things i want to get.if im stuck at home,i can swim,play the piano,read a book,pack my rm,or self learn some other language in the world.n there's art.


cleaning up my life.give an end to everything that's hasnt got one.solve problems,not wallow in them.loose ends aren't tied,they're cut,clean with no loose bits.


not stopping to think.i think too much anyway:) except maybe on the bus.bus journeys though,they have an end


cannot sit and do nothing,cannot have time to think.today is not my entire life.i won't die.today will be a part of my life that will fade and be forgotten.yes.

using today and only today to make the cut.the rest will fade.



from tomorrow onwards.i know none of such a thing.


nothing is my entire life.only God.and only under God will i find solace.

=

mindy rmb to bring that bk tml!

and the blue polish.
will wash myself in blue.and attempt red.
purple..hmm...



/something interesting i found.in no mood to look deeper into it though.

“They solaced their wretchedness, however, by duets after supper” (Jane Austen).


everything's ok really. :)